• Therapy with Alex
    Therapy with Alex Taking the first steps in acknowledging that you need support doesn’t make you weak, in fact it is quite the opposite. Considering the demanding world we live in today I believe that therapy is becoming a necessity
  • Fear of the Unknown
    Fear of the Unknown Through undertaking therapy we can stretch our capacity to tolerate the moment to moment uncertainties of life. Over time you may come to embrace the ebbs and flows of life, and gain an acceptance of ‘what is’.
  • Know thyself
    Know thyself Socrates (C. 469 BC-399 BC) one of the world’s most celebrated philosophers knew the priceless value of self knowledge. In our generation self knowledge gained in therapy is yet again becoming the King of currency.
  • Therapy with Alex
    Therapy with Alex Taking the first steps in acknowledging that you need support doesn’t make you weak, in fact it is quite the opposite. Considering the demanding world we live in today I believe that therapy is becoming a necessity

Your input is important to me. Please provide your valuable feedback. Here are some testimonials from my past and present clients:

Question 1
What, if anything, have you gained/learned about yourself over the duration of our work together, and were there any key/standout moments?
“I think I have learned I can stick up for myself without it coming across as a negative. I didn’t realise how little I’d dealt with being bullied as a child. It’s given me an inner strength I didn’t know I possessed”.
Question 2
Would you recommend therapy with me and if so, why?
“Absolutely recommend therapy with yourself. Why? You’ve got a real ability to go to the root of the problem, whether I think there’s one or not, you’ve got a real way about you (not sure how to word that any better off the cuff) I’ve certainly gained a lot more from these therapy sessions than I actually thought I would”.
 
Date of Posting: 10 March 2020
Posted By: K S
Teesside
Question 1
What, if anything, have you gained/learned about yourself over the duration of our work together and were there any key/standout moments?
“I think the main thing I’ve learned about my preconceptions before starting therapy is that there needs to be a definitive answer, solution. Sometimes accepting things can really shed some light on things I didn’t feel were connected. You’ve got straight to the point and went through my past and tied things into my present with the theory explaining that. I’ve looked at these things and accepted that they play a part in how I am and who I am. I can choose how I am in the here and now. The drama triangle was a standout, realising how events bounce around without escape was big, accepting that and understanding that was powerful. Actually realising and knowing this is what I’m doing, and this is what will come from that, you used “that’s not for me” regularly which took me a while to get my head around. What you meant was I’m not willing to accept this because there’s other ways I can go about this. I don’t need to carry that weight. It’s helped me to have a different view on almost everything, day to day interactions. Transference was also useful, explaining how that can have an effect on how we see and are seen. I’m aware that my triggers haven’t necessarily changed but how I see them has in a positive way, giving me more choice and freedom. For me the acceptance part as well, when people have talked to me about therapy a lot of it has been acceptance that you can get yourself into cycles, and you can take one step outside of it to be removed and say “what was I doing”.
Question 2
Would you recommend therapy with me and if so, why?
“Absolutely again you’ve commented a little bit about feedback, the stigma men have, I was absolutely that guy, I’ve not understood the idea of therapy, I’d tried CBT so I had a reference point I’d seen a different style. The way I’ve tried to describe how I feel and why it’s not the same for everyone. Your mind sees the cage, the lock is on the outside and you’ve helped me unlock it. Your own personal style, I can imagine not everyone goes around it the way you do, which isn’t negative or positive. I thought it would be a lot more formal, a bit like in the movies. It’s been far more ‘in conversation’ planned but loose and I’d say it takes a couple of sessions to be able to feel comfortable in speaking to someone about things that you’ve never spoke about and to see how these methods are working. I wanted to come but there was anxiety. I came to look forward to Tuesdays to see what I’d learn next, to unlock that cage and make it a bit wider.
I did expect my therapist to throw the odd swear word in, to tell me about your own experiences, that threw me a little bit. But it has helped, because opening up is easier when others open up to you. That two way thing is eased when someone else will do the same in some degree. Good friends are people who tell each other things. I don’t feel as judged as I’m other relationships”.
 
Date of Posting: 07 February 2020
Posted By: N W
Teesside
Question 1

What, if anything, have you gained/learned about yourself over the duration of our work together and were there any key/standout moments?

“What was key for me was the chain of events following our accident. I’ve learned It’s OK to not feel OK. It is what it is now, and what happened no longer controls me. I accept what happens, I’m no longer ruled by it.
The practical breathing Excercise’s we started with was helpful straight away in grounding me, it gave me a platform to work from.
The biggest standout moment for me was talking about the accident, I felt really rubbish after, like a watershed moment. Then I came through it and learned I didn’t need to lock it away constantly. I cried here, pushing it away hadn’t done me any good. Even walking through the door was a major step forward for me”.

Question 2

Would you recommend therapy with me, and if so, why?

“Definitely. It’s absolutely worked for me. I’ve lost what I thought it would be like. You’ve probed and got things out of me that were holding me back and it’s been much more conversational than I though it would be. You tackle things head on. Without hesitation I’d say ‘go and speak to Alex’.
 
Date of Posting: 19 October 2019
Posted By: Ed O
Teesside
Question 1
What, if anything, have you gained or learned about yourself over the duration of our work together. And were there any key/standout moments?

“Alex has shown me that I am a much stronger person than I thought I was. He's shown me how to deal with certain issues and I have a newly gained confidence in myself.
In particular a key standout moment was when we did roleplay to help me understand some situations and it really did answer a lot of questions for me... apart from the fact that I would never ever have pictured myself ever having the guts to agree to do roleplay ever ! But it really does help and I'm so glad I did it”.

Question 2
Would you recommend therapy with me, and if so, why?

“I would recommend Alex as a therapist because he fully made me feel at ease from our very first meeting, he is professional and he has a kind and understanding aura about him, there is always a cuppa on hand and an endless supply of tissues. !!
Thank you so very much Alex, you've shown me who I really am and gave me guidance through some exceptionally difficult times, for this I will be eternally grateful. Thank you”.
 
Date of Posting: 13 October 2019
Posted By: Kath W
Teesside
Question 1
What, if anything, have you gained/learned about yourself over the duration of our work together. And where there any key-standout moments?

“I've realised how much I am not in control of my own life and have gained the ability to be able to look at myself and assess how I'm feeling and what my actions are doing to myself and those around me in more depth. I've realised I bring a hell of a lot of stress in to my life that makes me miserable and effects my mental health.

There's parts of me that are very selfish and I've lost my empathy for others to the point where I can feel nothing at all for someone I had a massive connection with an hour earlier.

Social anxiety was something I thought I'd just have to live with and I abused alcohol to relieve that as well as using it to mask any stress in my life. I found the social anxiety suprisingly easy to deal with which has helped me cut down drinking a lot. I still find myself drinking more than I should, but I'm keeping an eye on it and trying to create a different behaviour pattern if I find myself in a situation where drinking is expected or encouraged.

I thought I was strong by being able to walk away from a relationship in the past, but I've realised it takes a stronger person to face up to a problem and resolve it. I'm realising that when I am stressed I am more prone to walking away and sticking two fingers up at the problem. I can now look at this pattern and be more in control of the situation.

My relationship with my current girlfriend has become a lot easier for both myself and for her due to our therapy.

I've not felt I've learned a great deal or gained many new behaviours from our sessions, but my life is changing for the better and I realise I am on the right path now...also someone recently said to me "When you say the word 'but' it wipes out what you've said before it". (You) So I'm now looking at the future with different eyes, re-assessing myself and hopefully coming back after a break with a refreshed view of what I need to work on to continue bettering myself”.

Question 2
Would you recommend therapy with me, and if so, why?

“Yes, after reading about you on a webpage I got the impression I'd be able to ask you to be tough with me and kick me in to shape a bit. I knew I'd try and pull the wool over your eyes so warned you about this at the start.

We soon created a connection I was happy with and you helped me through some things I was struggling with and opened my eyes to some things I didn't realise I was struggling with.

You like a challenge and have a passion for your work. You’re polite and easy to talk to even for someone with issues talking about their problems.

You have a great place to talk that is comfortable, private and makes you feel at home.

This was my first time using a therapist and I would highly reccommend Alex to anyone thinking of trying it”.
 
Date of Posting: 21 August 2019
Posted By: Rob
Teesside
Question 1
What, if anything, have you gained/learned about yourself over the duration of our work together, and where there any key-standout moments?

“I’ve learned I have to not take on other people’s problems and let them make their own mistakes. Let things take there own course, what will be will be.
Don’t be ashamed to talk with others about your problems and talk up for yourself if people run you down regarding your state of mind.
I realise how much I have taken on over my life so far and how strong I have been over the years.
Important point I still love my parents so very much and talking to my dad with you in role play I am so proud of him for thanking me in trying to save his life”.

Question 2
Would you recommend therapy with me, and if so, why?

“I would highly recommend you to anybody I cross paths with who is in a bad situation, you are a true professional. The most important thing is your own life experience that you can draw upon and your caring attitude to me and others.
I can only thank you for saving me from self destruction you gave me the tools, positive thoughts and courage to get on with my life. I thank you again.
I won’t hesitate to call you if I start to drift back in that dark place.
Love to you and your family.
Warmly Ian xx”
 
Date of Posting: 15 August 2019
Posted By: Ian
Cleveland
Question 1
What, if anything, have you gained/learned about yourself over the duration of our work together, and where there any key-standout moments?

“I’ve gained some communication skills, I’m better able to talk to people about my problems. Better resolution skills. Stopped being so harsh on myself. Doing the anger work with the baseball bat really stood out for me, I felt like I’d never been able to let stuff out, that took a lot of weight off my shoulders. I feel like I don’t have to be defined by my past and I can grow and learn and shit. Being able to communicate what I want and don’t want held me back in the past, with my new partner now I’m a lot better at expressing myself. Another point that stood out for me was when you pointed out how much I clammed up and how hard you had to work because of that. I took that point and worked harder in here and now I do the same when I’m out of the therapy room with people”.

Question 2

“Yeah I would because it’s helped me a lot to deal with stuff in my life and it’s give me more confidence. Again I bottle less up now and express myself more clearly. A lot of the time before by not saying much I was kind of being dishonest, some of the things I left out or didn’t say, were important to me and others, now I can ask them what they want and tell them what I want. It feels like I’m being more direct and more honest.

N, W.
Stockton-on-Tees
July 2019
 
Date of Posting: 19 July 2019
Posted By: N,
Stockton-on-Tees
Question 1
What, if anything, have you gained/learned about yourself over the duration of our work together, and where there any key-standout moments?

“I’ve gained discipline, maturity and more honesty with myself and others. I’m also more confident and relaxed in general.
A standout moment was when we were working on possible relationships and I said I’m looking for a 9 and ideally a 10 based on looks. You asked what I thought I was. I said a 9, you disagreed and said you thought I was a 7 with a potential of being an 8 if I worked hard at it. I didn’t like hearing that, but yes I was objectifying others and dismissing my own shortfalls. You’re very direct and honest, I needed that.
I’ve been off the alcohol now for nearly a year, lost two stone, sharpened up all round, you’ve challenged me to put myself out there to better my social skills and I’ve took on the challenge. I’ve been to cookery classes, dancing lessons, kickboxing classes and kept it all up building relationships along the way and learning new skills.
I’m less selfish now, I think before I act impulsively, and wonder how others might be affected. I’m also better at handling conflict, probably because of your challenging style and my kickboxing sessions where I get a lot of frustration and anger out. And the role play, I’ve got a lot out of that.
You don’t tell people what they want to hear, I haven’t had much of that and the times that I have I’ve either kicked off or ran away. Being an only child with an overprotective mother probably made my skin too thin, I could have done with some siblings to bounce off. You’ve been like that big brother or Dad. Firm but fair.”.

Question 2
Would you recommend therapy with me, and if so, why?

“Yes I would, for all of the above reasons. I like myself more now and my life is fuller. I’ll miss you and I’ll miss coming and if I need too, I won’t be too proud to come back for help again. Thank you”.

 
Date of Posting: 17 July 2019
Posted By: Andrew
Stockton-on-Tees
Question 1
What, if anything, have you gained/learned about yourself over the duration of our work together, and where there any key-standout moments?

“Without wanting to sound too dramatic I survived my own personal holocaust. I was surprised at how much I was taken in by other men because I was so desperate. I remember the day I was in here and in my head absolutely flipped, not knowing whether I would or could come back, it was a massive turning point, I kept feeling the spike and the dips. I remember you asking ‘how old I felt right now’ and then saying ‘you’re acting like a spoilt kid throwing all the toys out the Pram and books off the shelf, what would your adult say to your kid?’ it felt like a slap in the face and a real waking moment. Looking back it all seems so unreal, I’ve learnt so much including not judging myself so harshly. What happened was a living nightmare.
I know I’ve lost some friendships through it, I’ve had to withdraw from some people which happens when battle lines are drawn.
I’m way happier in my own company than I ever imagined I could be, and I now have a new healthy relationship where I can enjoy male company in a way I thought was impossible.
Despite pressure and temptation I was determined not to be a man hater as that would only hurt me.
I’m employed again, Solvent and capable of having healthy relationships with both sexes. I can also be vulnerable and not be fearful of falling apart.
I realise now I never ever knew the man I was married too. All the things I brushed off came back to haunt me, and in the end I chose not to live a lie. I’ve invested in myself with you and it’s money well spent.
I know now I do deserve more, I like company but I don’t need it. I’m comfortable in my own skin. I’m a better listener to my friends now too and have shared my story with women’s groups which they tell me they’ve found inspiring”.

Question 2
Would you recommend therapy with me, and if so, why?

“Yes, like I even had to say to my panicking GP who put a safeguarding call in on me! You were recommended to me a long time ago, she said you’re very tough, clever, direct, and don’t take any shit. She said there’s nothing I could throw at you that would surprise you ‘he’s been around the block to places other therapists couldn’t begin to understand’ I needed that, I’ve met the others, the twin set and pearls therapists and academics who I’ve had to minimise myself and my experiences with, or the ones who just try to medicate you. I needed somebody who knew the dark side to get me out of the one I’d been put in. You need people with life experience, you’ve got a lot of it and you can’t buy that or learn it, unless you’ve lived it.
You’re probably the most unlikely therapist in the world, there’d be people I wouldn’t dare send to you, not without warning them”.

 
Date of Posting: 19 June 2019
Posted By: Julie
Middlesbrough
Question 1
What, if anything, have you gained over the duration of our work together. And where there any stand out/key moments?

“There were many standout moments. First time I met you, I was in a position that life wasn’t worth anything. Each session I could feel that feeling going away, making me want to come back and infact aching to come back to see you another day. Everyone wants be positive and each session I left more positive. I have learnt from all your sessions, there is a purpose in everyone’s life, mine is to help, in one way or other and you showed me the way”.

Question 2
Would you recommend therapy with me and if so, why?

“You are the only therapist I know who takes personal interest in your clients. I call me client, but I never got that feeling. Infact I felt you never considered me just a client. Once I even saw a tear in your eye as I was talking. It’s the human element that makes you unique. That’s why I d recommend you, whoever goes to Alex, stick with him for a few sessions, you ll know the difference then”.
 
Date of Posting: 18 April 2019
Posted By: S,K.
Teesside

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I am on a voluntary register that has been accredited by the Professional Standards Authority.

The AVR scheme was set up by the Government to improve standards and safety for the benefit of the public and demonstrates my commitment to high professional standards, to enhancing safety and delivering a better service.

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“It is the very pursuit of happiness that thwarts happiness.”
Dr. Viktor Frankl

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